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Imagine our Arab World

How important is this practice of "Random Acts of Kindness" in our Arab World? Some people might say" it is a nice idea". Yet it's not just a good idea, researchers found that doing kind things for other people makes us happier ourselves.

When I was 13 years old, I had to change my long-time school. I had to leave my old friends and teachers behind and move on. On my first day, I was so anxious and all I wanted is to go home. But, one student came and sat next to me. I still remember her smile, and on lunch break, we spent time together talking and laughing. I found out that changing my school was the best thing that ever happened in my life because I met new friends and touched new sparkles of kindness. Sometimes all it takes is a smile to make someone's day. And that is what we need in the Arab World. 

We need to stop talking about politics and religion and start talking kindness. Imagine everyone is doing random acts of kindness, wouldn't be the world so beautiful to live in?! 

Imagine your neighbor baking cookies and bringing it to you when you are sick! Imagine your co-worker sending you encouragement message before a presentation! Imagine you forgot your phone in a taxi and the driver brings it back to you! Just imagine...

And the best thing about it is that kindness is free, so sprinkle it everywhere and if you see someone without a smile, give them one of yours!!

Lead by example! Show someone there's hope in our Arab World.

By Heidi Shebaro

Founder of "The Kindness Project in the Middle East", a teacher and a blogger

Say YES!

I noticed myself using the word "No" lately too much especially with a 3 years old boy in the house. That is quite normal when you have kids but I feel like I use it more often with adults nowadays. 

Have you ever felt that you say "No" to everyone? Are your conversations more negative? 

Realizing that you do is a huge step to fixing things. Reorganize your thoughts and think before you say your answer. Words can transform lives. You can hurt someone or heal someone by using those words. 

From now on, I choose to be an affirmative person. I will say positive words, encouragement and supportive words without any expectation of anything in return. I will be generous with my words of affirmation to my husband, my family, my friends, and to my colleagues.

Next time someone at school or work or in your neighborhood asks for a volunteer to help do something or make something happen, just say "yes". Don't invent excuses. Just say yes. You will feel great about yourself. 

When your neighbor asks you to babysit their child for an hour, just say yes. Being affirmative is a very powerful tool. It will change people's feelings towards each others.

When your spouse asks you to go somewhere or do something, just say yes. And see how your relation will become much better.

You want to take this challenge with me. Try for a whole week to say yes to everyone who ask you to do anything. And let me know how it goes. You can also write every night before you sleep 3 positive words. This will change your attitude to a more positive one - Trust me!

  By Heidi Shebaro

  Founder of "The Kindness Project in the Middle East", a teacher and
  a blogger

Complain NOT!

A colleague of mine likes to complain about everything. She sees the negative in everything and rarely notices any positive thing in life. Complaining a lot is not healthy, and the biggest problem is when you don't realize that you complain and live in denial.

“Complaining does not work as a strategy. We all have finite time and energy. Any time we spend whining is unlikely to help us achieve our goals. And it won't make us happier.” 
― Randy Pausch, The Last Lecture

I realized it was getting into me. And that I have to do something. So, first I stopped linking that person to "complaining", reminding myself of all the other aspects of her personality. 

When I see her complaining, I put the "I don't care" look. I don't argue, I don't show I am upset. I just listen. 

If I knew that I will see that person often, I would've wrote her an email expressing my feelings and trying to help her stop complaining. But because I don't see her much, I didn't see the need to do so.

What helps also is having a 3 years old boy in the house. And whenever I am with her, I keep thinking of my boy and find lot of similarities between the two. That's when I recharge myself with lots of patience.

One last advice that I found helpful is not being with that person alone. When we are in groups, I don't feel the tension anymore and I tend to engage with other conversations.

One of the random acts of kindness ideas can be "Complain less". So, stop being negative about a friend or colleague who complain a lot, and start seeing the positive in them. 

Try it! Go 24 hours without complaining. Not even once. Then watch your life start to CHANGE! This will improve the quality of your life! Gratitude is also a great transformer of misery, but we will talk about that in the next article.

Do you complain a lot? Or do you know someone who does? Share with us your ideas on how to deal with that.

By Heidi Shebaro

Founder of "The Kindness Project in the Middle East", a teacher and a blogger

What after the Lebanese bombing?

With all what is going on these days in the Middle East from conflicts and bombs... I felt the need to remind people about the importance of KINDNESS. 

Have you ever felt hopeless? Have you ever felt that things will never get better?

I bet half of the people who live in our Arab World share with you these same feelings. But remember, we are all in control of our own destiny and it is up to us to make changes for the better. All of us are responsible because we do not act and change.

Haven't we learned enough from all our past experiences? Haven't we been hurt so many times?

It is time for CHANGE. Anything is possible no matter how hopeless it looks now. 

Start by yourself, spread kindness, spread awareness. "Be a fruit loop in a world full of cheerios".

You want an Arab World full of kindness and love, peace and joy; you have to be kind and loving, peaceful and happy. Then your brother will be the same, then your parents, then your friends, then the circle keeps on growing and expanding until it becomes worldwide.

It sounds easy, right?! And it is as easy as it sounds. Start by "YOU". I already started by "ME".

We are so good at complaining. After every crisis, we complain and we talk about the need for change, but we don't do anything. "DO" that's the secret. If not now then when? If not you then who?

If we want progress, if we want to change "third world country title", WE have to change. One at a time!

Join "The Kindness Project in the Middle East" today and spread random acts of kindness in our Arab World.

By Heidi Shebaro

Founder of " The Kindness Project in the Middle East", a teacher and a blogger

Manners Please!

Having good manners means being extremely respectable. It requires from you to use your etiquettes in everything you do whether it was in the house or in a restaurant..

You can start by using words like "thank you", "please" and "excuse me". Be the first to greet people you know or you don't know. When addressing a person you don't know use "Sir" and "Madame". The point here isn't to use those words sometimes and sometimes no. You have to be persistent. It has to come genuinely from you. It doesn't matter if you were speaking to an older person or a child. Using your manners shouldn't change regardless of the place, the time, the situation or the people. And that includes using your manners with people you don't like as well.

Other than words, you can use your manners when driving. It's a matter of safety as well. Following the laws, giving signals, don't honk, don't tailgate, stop for pedestrians. This is a very important thing we lack in our Arab World. We don't need a traffic policeman to use our manners. In Western countries, a car will stop on the red light at 12 a.m. in the morning where there is no human passing not because he is afraid of the camera or a ticket but because he respects the law and uses his manners.

Holding doors open to other people, giving up your seat on a public transportation to an elderly or a pregnant woman, these are also great manners.

One manner we lack of in our Arab countries is congratulating someone who just got promoted or someone who done something worthy of praise. We have to get over our egos and wish good to others same as if it was us. Always treat people the way you would like to be treated.

A nation without manners can never progress. Period!

By Heidi Shebaro

Founder of " The Kindness Project in the Middle East", a teacher and a blogger

My husband crushed me with his feet

Reading the middle east news in the morning as usual, I was shocked to see that post. Carine Salameh, a famous anchor on a Lebanese television was hit by her husband.

It is not acceptable anymore! Enough!! Women are not animals! Even animals shouldn't be beat up according to any religion or any moral school.

All the campaigns and movements who advocate Arab women are NOT enough. The change has to start from our manners. The way the parents raise their kids and the manners that we teach our children.. This will grow up with them and stay forever.

Yes, behind every act of violence against women, parents who didn't raise their boys well. And by "well" I don't mean prepare them food and send them to good schools. Parents who reacted harshly and negatively to their kids' aggressive acts, parents who sat bad examples, parents who continued a cycle of violence and transferred it to their kids, parents who didn't stop the gender-based stereotypes, parents who spoiled their kids...

No wonder we started 2014 with "The Kindness Project in the Middle east" campaign!! We felt and touched the need for kindness, manners, morals and etiquettes in our Arab World.

Just last week, I was chatting with a lady who has a Facebook Group, more like a religious group. And I was asking to put some kindness posts on her group to encourage acts of kindness in the Middle East. Guess what she said!! Her exact reply was: "We only put religious posts". Isn't religion about morals and kindness?! Since when religion meant just prayers and sayings. Every religion started with manners and kindness.

We will not loose hope. We will continue our kindness project. Starting with 1 person, soon we will be millions.

And until we change the way we raise our children, we will still see violence and wars in our offspring.

By Heidi Shebaro

Founder of " The Kindness Project in the Middle East", a teacher and a blogger

Genuinely Kind

Now how to be kind? If you asked any person in the Arab World, he/she will tell you:" I am the kindest person on earth" or "I have the kindest heart ever" etc. but...

Being kind is a way of living; it is about caring genuinely for everyone surrounding  you. And a person can't be kind to others if he wasn't kind to himself. You will say " Well for sure everyone is kind to himself". I will tell you that not everyone can do this simple thing. Be kind to yourself means believe in yourself, stand up for yourself and boost your trust circle.

Be happy, funny and thankful. When you smile, you are making someone's day by this simple gesture. You never know who is really having a bad day and your smiley face helped cheering him up. And that is a way of being kind.

When you are kind, you are not only doing good to others, you are doing good also to your own mental health. You are sending positive vibes to your heart and mind, you will feel fulfilled and grateful.

Don't be shy! You might be kind to someone and they might react differently. Don't let this discourage you. Do more efforts and expect nothing in return.

Let your kindness go beyond family and friends. Let it reach strangers. It is so good to be kind to our family and friends, and when you expand that kindness to strangers, you will gain a whole lot of beautiful feelings.

"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle", when I first read this quote, I asked myself "How many person was I rude at while they were hiding their own pain?". It is very important that we are aware of our surroundings and offer help whenever needed.

More ideas on practicing random acts of kindness on our Facebook page and Twitter account.

By Heidi Shebaro

Founder of " The Kindness Project in the Middle East", a teacher and a blogger

Start your kindness chain NOW!

We understood what random acts of kindness mean. We realized that we need this in our Arab World. What's next?

You don't have to read books or encyclopedias, search the internet or google to find out what to do next. Once you took the decision to change your life and start doing these random acts of kindness, your heart will lead.

Be Kind - Kindness as an attitude is infectious. When you're willing to share your kindness, others will be inspired by your example and think about doing something as kind themselves. "Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible". - Dalai Lama

Use your manners - Manners in our Middle East aren't dead, they've just been forgotten in many ways. Hold doors open for others, hold an umbrella over someone in the rain, say thank you.

Give out compliments generously - Tell people you know how special they are, how pretty they look today, what a great job they have done. Better yet, tell people you don't know some compliments and make their day.

Volunteer - Offer helping hands. Clean up without being asked. Make up food parcels for people in need.

You can find more steps and ideas on our Facebook page and twitter account. 

One last thing to say, the greatest act of kindness is expecting nothing in return when doing it and the greatest impact when it is done with strangers.

Care to start your own random acts of kindness chain. Share with us your story.

By Heidi Shebaro
Founder of " The Kindness Project in the Middle East", a teacher and a blogger

Power of Kindness

Kindness is Contagious

Random Acts of Kindness caught on camera

Click here for more videos:

A healthy and joyful Middle East

I first heard the saying "practice random acts of kindness" when I arrived to the United States of America. It always struck me how practicing kindness is so simple yet so meaningful. And I wondered why we don't have this concept in the Middle East. 

Such behavior is surely the ground of a healthy and joyful society, where we happily give of ourselves to help another and such an act is happily received. Exactly what is needed in the Arab World. 

Be generous. Give to those you love; give to those who love you, give to the fortunate, give to the unfortunate — yes, give especially to those you don’t want to give. You will receive abundance for your giving. The more you give, the more you will have!– W. Clement Stone

What stops us in the Middle East from acting this way? Invariably it is our insecurities, lack of self-esteem and self-love, doubts and inadequacies. People are so drowned in conflicts, politics, wars that they forgot about the impact of kindness.

Random acts of kindness are essential to our well-being, as they liberate us from self-obsession, selfishness, and isolation; they are the effect of an open and loving nature. True generosity is giving without expectation, with no need to be repaid in any form. This is the most powerful act of generosity, as it is unconditional, unattached, and free to land wherever it will. Whether we give to our family, friends, or to strangers, it is the same. 

We may feel we have little to offer, but whether it is a warm homemade meal or a blanket, a cup of coffee or flowers is irrelevant–it is the act of giving itself that is important. You can find more kindness ideas here: The Kindness Project in the Middle East. And as Mahatma Gandhi said, Almost anything we do will seem insignificant, but it is very important that we do it.

Do you have a story of a random act of kindness? Share it with us below.

By Heidi Shebaro
Founder of " The Kindness Project in the Middle East", a teacher and a blogger

It's The Middle East!!

While Random acts of Kindness are taking place all over the world, except one small part of the map that is missing it. It's the Middle East!

It's not that they are not religious. No!! They are the main source of three major religions (Judaism, Christianity and Islam), and it's not that they are not kind to each others, I know some of them at least are. But aggressive acts are dominant in that place. And they need a wake up call.

So we thought we should remind them that no act of kindness no matter how small, is ever wasted. And provide them with some inspiration today to go out and pay it forward.

Here are some kindness ideas from The Kindness Project in the Middle East:

Praise someone's efforts: Thank your co-worker, write a small "good job" note, "high-five" someone.

Give someone flowers: You don't need an occasion to buy flowers, and no one can say no to a flower. It's a win-win situation here.

Tell someone they're special: You see someone having a bad day at the coffeeshop, tell them they're special! Make their day!

Practice a random act of kindness today and tell us about it.

By Heidi Shebaro
Founder of " The Kindness Project in the Middle East", a teacher and a blogger